Thursday, July 15, 2010

Uneventful

Woke up without any plans of leaving my bed. But soon stomach ranted and raved so I was forced to get up and chew some food. Surfed the net with the objective of finding porn sites PLUs enjoy. And I did.

Until I made that one awesome click that would eventually lead me to CorporateCloset's blog. I got hooked up and now, I have to end this post so I can read more of his entries. He's been blogging since March 2007 so I have a lot of catching up to do.

On second thought, discovering CCs blog is THE event of the day. So please disregard this post's title.

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Deviation



Yeah.. yeah.. yeah.. I promised myself yesterday that I would start the action today and look for job openings. I know!

My day started quite right. I prepared my resume, cover letter, TOR and other documents. I was 'bout ready to print them but here's the news: THERE WAS YET AGAIN ANOTHER POWER SHORTAGE. And I'm not making excuses. There really was. It lasted for over 2 hours and it really got me worried because my cousin and I agreed to leave for the city at 1 in the afternoon. It was passed 12 when the electric supply came back.Ever got that feeling when you were so into something and then there's destruction and after, you're finding it difficult to continue what you have passionately started? Well, I felt that! And even with the power back, I resolved to just saving the documents in my e-mail draft and planned to print in when we would be in the city.

So there we were, me and my cousin, at around 3 0'clock inside SM mall. We raced to the restrooms to unload the bodily liquid that were stocked in our kidneys while on the road. Next, we bought bread at "French baker" and decided to check out the movie schedules. And you know what happened next.

Instead of submitting resumes to companies we were interested to work in, we found ourselves handling our movie tickets to the lady in front of cinema 2. Sadly, the movie that we agreed to watch was released a couple of weeks ago- Eclipse. We were kinda losers. We didn't make it to the first day of showing as planned since my cousin took the the board exams for nursing. After that, there's procrastination. But we finally made it today. Congratulations to us for being such dubs!

Anywho, there were some really good parts in the movie. The fight scenes had me gripping on the arms of my chair. But it was Angela's graduation speech that really got me. I'm mellow-dramatic right now with all this life transition going on, being jobless, unclear life plans, frustrations for unattained goals, insecurities and whatnot. I'm still wallowing in it but the speech kinda help me take a step forward. Let me share it-



Angela’s Graduation Speech (Eclipse)
"When we were five, they asked us what we wanted to be when we grew up. Our answers were thing like astronaut, president, or in my case… princess.

When we were ten, they asked again and we answered – rock star, cowboy, or in my case, gold medalist. But now that we’ve grown up, they want a serious answer. Well, how ’bout this: who the hell knows?!

This isn’t the time to make hard and fast decisions, its time to make mistakes. Take the wrong train and get stuck somewhere chill. Fall in love – a lot. Major in philosophy ’cause there’s no way to make a career out of that. Change your mind. Then change it again, because nothing is permanent.

So make as many mistakes as you can. That way, someday, when they ask again what we want to be… we won’t have to guess. We’ll know."

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Hiatus

After 3 weeks of not working with no hobbies or sports to do, I found myself lying in bed the entire day today- bored as hell. It has become routinary: sleep, eat, surf the net, lay in bed, sleep.

I would have wanted this sort of vacation mode back when I was still employed as a call center agent, a time when I morning the night, and sleep was scarce. But know that I have a lot of time for sleeping, I pinpointed myself pestered at how life has turned out for me, at my financial woes, about uncertainties.

You see, I've been dealing with this some sort of depression after a decided to leave work and just right after I got well from a sickness. I would soon find out that I'm undergoing a life transition. I've pondered, reassessed, reevaluated and redefined my goals and the means of achieving them.

At this point, I feel I had given it enough time and I'm ready to go back on track. Turning into a different direction and taking on a new road, I'm all set to take my next step. I had enough of resting and relaxing. Tomorrow, I'm going to start moving on.

I need to start ASAP. I feel like I wasted enough time planning my attack for an unknown battle and unbeknown enemies. After all, life is full of changes and the unexpected.

A new journey is starting tomorrow. So I'll sleep early to prepare for that new ride. I'll sleep but tomorrow I must start anew. I need to do it, or else, I might become comfortable procrastinating and might not be even get to start anything. One more day spent in bed will make me go bonkers!

Monday, July 12, 2010

Fluky


The day after my 26th birthday was scheduled for my monthly credit card bill payment.

Woke up from heat and heavy sweating due to the power shortage that occurs everyday for 2 hours or so in our place. They termed that "rotating block-out" since to conserve energy, the power providers have taken it upon themselves to cut the supply of electricity for a couple of ours in different places everyday. And may I say that's just a brilliant idea!

Anyhow, I was still a little bit inebriate from last night's drinking but forced to get my butt off my bed and bathed. After all, it was already 10 in the morning.

I traveled 2 hours from home to the city with a cousin and went on to the bank to pay my tab.

Since I don't have much money to splurge, I just went to a nearby mall and ate. After, I decided to go home. Hailed a bus, seated myself comfortably once i was inside and thought that was all for the day. Boring and unproductive.

Until the bus stopped to pick up some more passengers and a young guy, about 19 or 20 of age, sat beside me. He was kinda cute but i resolved to ignore him and fixed my sight outside the small bus window. After a few, i got this uneasy feeling. On my left side, i felt like a pair of eyes is staring at me. I made sure it was true by facing the guy to my left and indeed, he was staring at me. He smirked when our eyes locked and slightly touched my hand while pretending to be scratching his legs.

Since I was trying to live a virginal life, I looked away. I can feel that his eyes were still fixed on me though. I was starting to get conscious and as i always do when i am, wet my dry lips with my tongue. I heard him let out a low but audible moan and then laughed. I wasn't able to hold it anymore. I gestured to feel my bag that's on my lap intentionally brushing his legs in the process. After that, i positioned my hand on my lap, looked at him and looked down on my hands making sure he was following where i was looking. I saw him smile once more and i looked away again. Only this time, my eyes widened as i felt a hand held my left hand that was sitting on my lap. I made a poker face and looked down. It was his hand holding mine. I wanted to stop him but i didn't object. I didn't have the strength to withdraw my hands from his grip. I wanted it. I liked it.

Mindful of the people around that might see what's going on, he covered the locked fingers with his bag. I looked at him again. I looked back. I smiled. He did too.

I was trying to process what was going on but I ended up telling myself "what the F*CK!". I better stop analyzing things and just enjoy this amorphous thing that's happening.

Surprisingly, after what seemed to be seconds he took his hand away and placed it inside his pockets. Took his wallet and got some bills, knocked the steel bar in front of his seat with a coin and the bus stopped. I was glued to my seat. Speechless. Wanting more... but i was just dumbfounded. Astonished of the fact that it just happened so fast. He got off the bus and stood beside the road as if waiting for the bus to leave before he walks away. I kept my eyes outside and as the bus went on, I saw him on the bus window. Standing still. Looking up. I looked down at him and smiled. He flashed his teeth and winked at me.

That was it. It was a short but sweet encounter. Too bad i wasn't able to ask for his number or gave him my digits. But there's always a next time. I'll get ready for the next random encounter.

It's been 6 hours since I go home. But I'm still gleeful from the precipitous event on that homeward-bound bus ride.